Tuesday, March 17, 2015

If you don't have anything nice to say....

I am currently running an "ad" on Facebook.  I spent Sunday reorganizing my shops and took over 1/3 of my inventory (62 items - way too much!) and knocked everything down by 25%.  In creating my ad, I selected 6 images that randomly post on Facebook and hopefully attracts viewers to my site.  I don't specifically select the individual viewership - just a range of "type" of person.  One of the pictures I posted was of the necklace, which is priced at $51.


Some unknown person, who is not my "Friend" on Facebook left the comment "Pretty Expensive!!!

Now, although I am pretty thin-skinned, I was not hurt by this comment - I was shocked at the callousness in which this person felt it necessary to comment when no good will come from it.  It was not constructive criticism, which I always welcome.  It was simply rude.

At first glance, I am sure that, in her mind, it was a piece of copper and cheap glass.  My first instinct was to respond to her and explain the number of hours it took to make this chain - from heavy gauge, square wire.  Each link is measured, cut, sanded, formed, and forged. Square wire twists when formed, and has to be hand manipulated back to its square shape.  After two solid days of making the chain, it was then dipped in liver of sulfur, and hand buffed...each tiny piece of copper.  It was then wrapped with an artist lampwork bead,which also took time to hand create.  It is truly one of a kind (check my shop - I have not made another!!) I could go on.  The proceeds are donated to charity - it states this in the ad.  

But, this woman would never understand handmade and I would have probably started a "Facebook Fight" - my life is way too short for that.  My mother would not approve.

I do not make jewelry for a living, to pay my bills.  I make jewelry because I enjoy it.  I donate the proceeds to charity.  I do not know how I would feel about this comment if I did rely on the income generated from its sale.  

So how did I respond?  Well, I had a mother who taught me manners - I can honestly say I continue to live my life with respect towards other...the adage "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" resonates within me.

I deleted her comment.

In reading the many, many nasty and rude posts and comments that people make on Facebook these days - the "faceless" comments from people you do not know and will never meet - turns me off completely.  The political rants that are beyond nasty, the attacks on ex-boyfriends and husbands/wives, all of it...just makes me roll my eyes in disgust.  

So, to the unknown woman who left the rude and callous comment on my Facebook ad, I repeat "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all"

Patti

19 comments:

  1. It's a beautiful necklace, well worth the price. It's just a total lack of understanding of and appreciation towards handmade. But I like your response. I hope your ad campaign shows results!

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  2. Good for you, Patti! Your work is lovely :) IMHO your reaction was spot on: that's what I would have done (after rehearsing a scathing comeback... but only in my mind LOL) Best of luck with the FB campaign :)

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  3. The "delete" key is my only true friend on Facebook (where I remain pretty anonymous for obvious reasons). I hope your using it sent the well-deserved message.

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  4. It's a stunning piece of art. And some do not have the knowledge to see it as art. Jewelry is what you buy in a chain store. Cheep metal that is manufactured on an machine and minimal human contact. This necklace is art. I believe it is well worth the money your asking for and probably more. It is created with love and is not just to be worn, but treasured. And for you to donate the proceeds shows that you are not in it for the money.

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  5. Well, I totally agree with you that if you don't have something good to say don't say anything. But, that's not the way now. Everyone can say what they feel like saying because they can! Rudeness has become a way of life and I think the fact that they can hide behind a computer screen is partly to blame. I don't have a FB account for several reasons. The rudeness is one of them. Anyone with an ounce of sense can see your necklace is gorgeous and worth more than $51. But, some people can't see quality and think they can buy the same thing on sale at Macy's for $10. Such is our society today!

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  6. Rise above. I just watched the Cinderella movie with my best friend of 30+ years and the theme was courage and kindness. People who say things like that are not your ideal customer and don't deserve another thought. Those who get it (I noticed the beautiful square wire links immediately) will understand and don't need to be told of the time and talent that it took to make this. You can't compete with a 'Walmart mentality' and you shouldn't try. You take pride in what you do and you have responded in this post with courage and kindness. Enjoy the day. Erin

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  7. Your necklace is so beautiful and obviously worth much more than the price you are asking. It is the type of jewelry that will become an heirloom and handed down from mother to daughter. It's hard to understand that someone would be so rude. You took the high road and hit delete---good for you!

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  8. I have had to quietly delete comments and to repeat offenders, I have had to block them entirely. This wasn't on an ad, but on my OKC page and my personal page. You handled it very well, Patti. There is no way to change someone's mind who is rude. Not many people understand how much time goes into handmade items.

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  9. All I can say is this person does not recognize the value of hand crafted. Your attention to detail is impeccable and so is your customer service. Both of these items are sorely lacking in big stores who purchase cheap junk jewelry from offshore. I am shocked at how much of our goods are made in China and ultimately end up in landfill not to mention the ridiculous over-packaging.

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  10. With the availability of cheap... and cheaply made jewelry... and even folks in the states not valuing their time and wondering why the eventually have to stop creating for sale. There are so many things going through my mind about this. Your necklace is gorgeous! $51 is a steal... a STEAL! And that's not only due to its beauty, but it's quality and effort to make. You can get these kinds of comments at art shows now, too... because the shows don't vet booths and the same as above. I haven't had it happen but a couple of times, but both times I just said that my jewelry isn't for everyone. That works every time. And usually that makes them stay and shop. :-)

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  11. That necklace is lovely & WAY underpriced at $51 for the quality of the components, the work involved and the sheer beauty of it. Sadly facebook & other social media allows faceless people to post whatever they wish without thought to the feelings of the poster. For that reason, I've stopped posting to the public. I only post to friends. Good for you for taking the high road & just deleting the comment.

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  12. You did the right thing Patti, not responding and deleting her comment. I find that people who are rude, especially on social media, are being passive aggressive and it usually stems from their own insecurities. We have to pick our battles in life and this is one that was so not worth the effort! Your necklace is gorgeous, very 'you' and well worth the asking price.

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  13. As a writer and as a Facebook participant, the delete key is my best friend.

    Your necklace is breathtaking, by the way.

    I donate 100% of the profits from my second book to charity.

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  14. Well said Patti, life is to short and precious to give any fluidity to tactless comments. I too was taught to live by the Golden Rule. I am also one of the lucky ones to own some of your well crafted pieces that I love and wear often.
    Therese

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  15. Very well said Patti - your philosophy on life is to be commended and so is the way you handled this comment. And, on another note - your necklace is worth every single penny (and then some!). All of your work is exquisitely hand-crafted with such quality and care. Not to mention it just 'kicks butt' and looks totally cool and awesome!! :-)

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  16. Oh I'm with Janet on this .... $51 is a steal for the craftsmanship you put into your work Patti!. Hit the delete button and don't look back. They are not worthy of your art. If they want a bargain ... there is a Walmart nearby. The fact that you donate so much to charity from all your gorgeous jewelry you create is a statement in itself. Keep creating, and don't listen to the 'white noise' of FB

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  17. Oh hunny - to be blunt, some people are just assholes. I don't see the point of leaving negative comments, but I suppose that's how some morons get their kicks. You did right in deleting the comment.....even if the temptation might have been to hunt her down and kick her ankles 'til they were red raw! Well....we all think you're awesome. And your jewellery is awesome. AND exceptional value. May those who have no taste or good breeding spontaneously combust. With love and light, naturally..... *ahem*. May your day be filled with sunshine and sparkles and hugs and kittens and candy-floss and ice-cream and fizzy pop and all things truly splendid! Have some hugs from me and The Colonel! xxx

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  18. My first thought was only $51. It is totally worth it and if she can't tell that, then you don't want her as a customer.

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  19. I understand COMPLETELY, Patti. On one of my card making videos (which took me hours to do) on YouTube, some dope left the comment that she was glad that her life was not as boring as mine! In cases like this, I always say to myself: "I wish you justice, and PLENTY of it!" Then tap DELETE, and disaster averted. Hang in there and you'll see justice. Patti, the world is a much better place with YOU in it! Continued blessings to you and your loved ones! Looking forward to your next post and heading over to your FB page.

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